Well I'm about to get sick
From watchin' my TV
Been checkin' out the news
Until my eyeballs fail to see
I mean to say that every day
Is just another rotten mess
And when it's gonna change, my friend
Is anybody's guess
So I'm watchin' and I'm waitin'
Hopin' for the best
Even think I'll go to prayin'
Every time I hear 'em sayin'
That there's no way to delay
That trouble comin' every day
No way to delay
That trouble comin' every day
Wednesday I watched the riot
I seen the cops out on the street
Watched 'em throwin' rocks and stuff
And chokin' in the heat
Listened to reports
About the whisky passin' 'round
Seen the smoke and fire
And the market burnin' down
Watched while everybody
On his street would take a turn
To stomp and smash and bash and crash
And slash and bust and burn
And I'm watchin' and I'm waitin'
Hopin' for the best
Even think I'll go to prayin'
Every time I hear 'em sayin'
That there's no way to delay
That trouble comin' every day
No way to delay
That trouble comin' every day
Well, you can cool it, you can heat it
'Cause, baby, I don't need it
Take your TV tube and eat it
'N all that phony stuff on sports
'N all the unconfirmed reports
You know I watched that rotten box
Until my head begin to hurt
From checkin' out the way
The newsman say they get the dirt
Before the guys on channel so-and-so
And further they assert
That any show they'll interrupt
To bring you news if it comes up
They say that if the place blows up
They will be the first to tell
Because the boys they got downtown
Are workin' hard and doin' swell
And if anybody gets the news
Before it hits the street
They say that no one blabs it faster
Their coverage can't be beat
And if another woman driver
Gets machine-gunned from her seat
They'll send some joker with a Brownie
And you'll see it all complete
So I'm watchin' and I'm waitin'
Hopin' for the best
Even think I'll go to prayin'
Every time I hear 'em sayin'
That there's no way to delay
That trouble comin' every day
No way to delay
That trouble comin' every day
Hey, you know something, people?
I'm not black but there's a whole lots a times I wish I could say I'm not white.
Well, I seen the fires burnin'
And the local people turnin'
On the merchants and the shops
Who used to sell their brooms and mops
And every other household item
Watched a mob just turn and bite 'em
And they say it served 'em right
Because a few of them were white
And it's the same across the nation
Black and white discrimination
Yellin' "You can't understand me!"
'N all that other jazz they hand me
In the papers and TV
And all that mass stupidity
That seems to grow more every day
Each time you hear some nitwit say
He wants to go and do you in
Because the color of your skin
Just don't appeal to him
No matter if it's black or white
Because he's out for blood tonight
You know we got to sit around at home
And watch this thing begin
But I bet there won't be many
Live to see it really end
'Cause the fire in the street
Ain't like the fire in the heart
And in the eyes of all these people
Don't you know that this could start
On any street in any town
In any state if any clown
Decides that now's the time to fight
For some ideal he thinks is right
And if a million more agree
There ain't no Great Society
As it applies to you and me
Our country isn't free
And the law refuses to see
If all that you can ever be
Is just a lousy janitor
Unless your uncle owns a store
You know that five in every four
Just won't amount to nothin' more
Gonna watch the rats go across the floor
And make up songs about being poor
Blow your harmonica, son!
What will you do if we let you go home
And the plastic's all melted
And so is the chrome?
Who are the brain police?
What will you do when the label comes off
And the plastic's all melted
And the chrome is too soft?
Waahh!
I think I'm gonna die . . .
I think I'm gonna die . . .
I think I'm going to die . . .
I think I'm going to die . . .
I think I'm going to die . . .
I think I'm going to die . . .
I'm gonna die . . .
I think I'm going to die . . .
I think I'm gonna die . . .
I'm going to die . . .
I think I'm gonna die . . .
I think I'm gonna die . . .
I think I'm gonna die . . .
Going to die!
Who are the brain police?
What will you do if the people you knew
Were the plastic that melted
And the chromium too?
Who are the brain police?
When I won your love
I was very glad
Every happiness in the world
Belonged to me
Then our love was lost
And you went away
Now I shed my tears
In lonely misery
I know now that
You never ever really loved me
It hurts me now to think
You never ever really cared
I sit and ask myself a thousand times
To try and find
What really happened
To the love
That we shared
How could I be such a fool
How could I believe
All those lies you told me
How could I be taken in
By your sweet face
You spoiled our love
You ruined my life
I'm so tore down
I'm a terrible disgrace
But there will come a time
And you'll regret the way
You treated me as if I was a fool
And didn't know
The many times you lied
About your love for me
Someone else is gonna know
That your love was just a show
How could I be such a fool?
Any way the wind blows
Is-a fine with me
Any way the wind blows
It don't matter to me
'Cause I'm thru with-a fussin'
And-a fightin' with-a you
I went out and found a woman
Who is gonna be true
She makes me oh so happy now
I'm never ever blue
Any way the wind blows
Any way the wind blows
Any way the wind blows
She is my heart and soul
And she loves me tenderly
Now my story can be told
Just how good she is to me
Yes, she treats me like she loves me
And she never makes me cry
I'm gonna stick with her
Till the day I die
She's not like you, baby
She would never ever lie
Any way the wind blows
Any way the wind blows
Any way the wind blows
Any way the wind blows
Any way the wind blows
Any way the wind blows
Now that I am free
From the troubles of the past
Took me much too long to see
That our romance couldn't last
I'm gonna go away
And leave you standing at the door
I'll tell you, pretty baby,
I won't be back no more
'Cause you don't even know
What love is for
Any way the wind blows
Any way the wind blows
Any way the wind blows
A year ago today
Was when you went away
But now you come back knockin' on my door
And you say you're back to stay . . .
Go cry
On somebody else's shoulder
I'm somewhat wiser now
And one whole year older
I sure don't need you now
And I don't love you
Anymore
You cheated me baby,
And told some dirty lies about me
Fooled around with all those other guys
That's why I had to set you free
I sure don't need you now
And I don't love you
Anymore
A year ago today
You went away
Now you come back cryin', cryin'
Darling, please, let me in
But I don't love you
I don't need you anymore
So go lean on . . . so go cry on
Somebody else's door
Go cry
On somebody else's shoulder
I'm somewhat wiser now
And one whole year older
I sure don't need you now
I don't love you
Anymore
Go ahead and cry
Go ahead and let the tears fall out of your eye
Let 'em fall on your dress
Who cares if it makes a mess?
I gave you my high school ring
Down at the malt shop, baby
We had a teen-age love
I thought it was charp
It was really so grand . . . but
You cheated me baby
And told some dirty lies about me
Fooled around with all those other guys
That's why I had to get my khakis pressed
I sure don't need you now
And I don't love you
Anymore
(Well, I don't love you)
(Baby)
Darling
(I-I-I-I)
Is it any wonder
(I don't need you)
After the way you treated me at the malt shop
(I-I-I-I)
That I would come to the conclusion that
(I don't want you)
You never really did dig me anyway
(Baby, baby)
I don't know whether it was the amount of rose oil
I use on my pompadour or
(My, [pompous] baby)
Whether it was, I don't know
Whether it was my shoes or my shirt
(Oh, baby)
Maybe I didn't button the top button or something
(Oh, baby)
Maybe it was the sticker on the back of my black Cadillac limousine
That says Mary Poppins is a junkie . . .
FZ: One more time . . .
Motherly love
Motherly love
Forget about
The brotherly and other-ly love
Motherly love
Is just the thing for you
You know your Mothers' gonna love ya
Till ya don't know what to do
The Mothers got love
That'll drive ya mad
They're ravin' 'bout the way we do
No need to feel lonely . . .
No need to feel sad,
If we ever get a hold on you
What you need is . . .
Motherly love
(Come on, get it now)
Motherly love
Forget about
The brotherly and other-ly love
Motherly love
Is just the thing for you
You know your Mothers' gonna love ya
Till ya don't know what to do
Nature's been good
To this here band
Don't ever think we're shy
Send us up some little groupies
And we'll take their hands
And rock 'em till they sweat and cry
What you need is . . .
Motherly love
(Get it now)
Motherly love
Forget about
The brotherly and other-ly love
Motherly love
Is just the thing for you
You know your Mothers' gonna love ya
Till ya don't know what to do
We can love ya
Till ya have a heart attack
You'd best believe that's true
We'll bite your neck
And scratch your back
Till you don't know what to do
What you need is . . .
Motherly love
Motherly love
Forget about
The brotherly and other-ly love
Motherly love
Is just the thing for you
You know your Mothers' gonna love ya
Till ya don't know what to do
You know I've got a little motherly love for you baby, yeah
You know I've got a little motherly love for you honey, yeah
You know it doesn't bother me at all
That you're only eighteen years old
'Cause I got a little motherly love for you baby
Interviewer: What was it like working with Tom Wilson?
FZ: Well, Tom was a great guy. He had a fascinating ability to read the Wall Street Journal, have a blonde sitting on his lap, and tell the engineer to add more compression to the vocal all at the same time. But by the time we started working on our third album, he was not talking to the engineer as much and talking to the blonde a little bit more and so I said, "Why don't you just let me produce this? I know you have other things on your mind . . . " And, uh, We're Only In It For The Money was the first album that I produced. He produced the first two.
FZ: The '60s was really stupid.
Interviewer: Okay, can you expand on that a little bit more, why you think the 60s were really stupid?
FZ: Well, it was a type of merchandising. Americans have this hideous weakness, you know, they have this desire to be okay, fun guys and gals. And they haven't come to terms with the reality of the situation—we were not created equal. Some people can do carpentry, some people can do mathematics, some people are brain surgeons and some people are winos, and that's the way it is. And we're not all the same. And this concept of one-worldism, everything blended and smoothed out to this mediocre norm that everybody downgrades themselves to be is stupid. And the '60s was merchandised to the public at large. My pet theory about the '60s is that there's a sinister plot behind it, but I don't wanna dwell upon that.
Interviewer: Okay.
FZ: Okay? It's just the lessons learned in the '60s about merchandising stupidity to the American public on a large scale have been used over and over again since that time.
Interviewer: Freak Out! and Absolutely Free influenced a generation.
FZ: Did they? They didn't sell that much. How'd they influence a generation? Come on, tell me.
Interviewer: That's what my question says.
FZ: Well, that wasn't a question. That was a statement.
Interviewer: That was my statement. Looking back over all these years and those records, how do you feel about them now? Any differently?
FZ: What, Freak Out! and Absolutely Free? They're okay for something that was done as a 4-track recording twenty years ago. I mean, I wouldn't sit around and listen to 'em.
Interviewer: You don't think that they had any influence on people?
FZ: Well, I know that a lot of people were vastly influenced by them. I've heard horror stories about that. But, so what? They weren't released to be influences; they were released as a form of entertainment for people who didn't have that type of entertainment before.
Interviewer: You once said, "Listen now that I'm thirty years old, now that I'm over the hill, I don't really give a shit, I don't care." Now that you're over forty, any comments?
FZ: Said it once, do I need to say it again?
Help, I'm a rock
Help, I'm a rock
Help, I'm a rock
Help, I'm a rock
Hah-hah-hah-hah-hah-hah-hah-hah-hah-hah-hah
Ay-yo ee-ow-ee-ow-ee
Veni-ma-no too mah
Veni veni ka toree tor (see'dra votra nee!)
Vedi-vedi ki-ta-la tom-bay
Vel-lay ka-la tay-la-tor
Vel-lay kay-la ta-la-sor
Vel-lay kay-lay ka-la-tor
Vel-lay kay-la sa-la-tay
Vor-a kor-ay tor-a-tor
Vel-la kay-la sa-la tch'ay
Vor-a kor-ay kay-a la kur'ad
Vor-a silli kay-t'ay tcha-to
Vor-a kay-ay tay-lay tay-ay tcha-to
Klanna-tholl
Klanna-tholl
Klanna-tholl
Pik-a-dill-a do-tchay
Pik-a-li-sa no-say (o-ooh)
Bi-ni-bi-ni me-ho-la-ka ta-ka-ho-ba
Say-kay pay-tay-ho-a-la tur-i-ca (Mee-oo-da-ra)
Chil-li pil-li ka-zi-o-bi-a bee bee bee bee (Do-dee-bop)
You know...(a-mad hee)
(Arrrrreeeeeeeeeeeee...)
Oooooooooooaaaaaaaaaa...
OOOOaaaaaaaaaaa.........(ah, hah)
O-wee ya yo yo yo a-ki-o wee
A-ki-o-ka a-yi-a-ee
A-ki-o-ka o-ki-o-wee
A-ki-o-ka o-ki-o-wee
A-ki-o-ka o-ki-o-wee
A-ki-o-ka o-ki-o-wee
A ki-o-ka o-wee-say ya-vo
Pedi-goh
Pedi-koh
Ann-i tcho-ee-see-na
Per-a-ko-ee-say
Kar-ra
May-a-ta
Uh-oh
Uh-oh
Uh-oh
Uh-oh
Uh-oh
Hay-lo
Pray-lo
Say la do sa ka ho-say
Vay-lay ko say-let-a-no
Vay-la ka sa la to-shay
Va-la ko-lo-tay
Ay-o
Lay-o
Lay-o
Aaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyaaaaaaaaa
O-ha o-ha yew
Ah-yew
Lay la-fan
ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah
Help, I'm a rock!
Help, I'm a rock!
Help, I'm a rock!
Somebody!
Help, I'm a rock!
Please!
Help, I'm a rock!
Please!
Help, I'm a rock!
Please!
Help, I'm a rock!
Wow!
Help, I'm a rock!
Wow!
Help, I'm a rock!
Help, I'm a rock!
Somebody helps me
Wow, man, it's a drag being a rock
(Help, I'm a rock)
(Help, I'm a rock)
(Help, I'm a rock)
I wish I was anything but a rock
Heck, I'd even like to be a policeman
Hey, you know what?
You know maybe if I practice, you know
Maybe if I pass my driving test
I could get a gig drivin' that bus that pick the freaks up
In front of Ben Frank's, right?
Help, I'm a cop!
Help, I'm a cop!
Help, I'm a cop!
Help, I'm a cop!
(Help, I'm a rock)
Help, I'm a cop!
(Help, I'm a rock)
It's a drag being a cop
I think I'd rather be the mayor
Always wondered what I was gonna be when I grew up, you know
Always wondered whether or not . . . whether or not I could make it
You know, in society, because,
You know, it's a drag when you're rejected
So I tore the cover off a book of matches
And I sent in
And I got this letter back that said . . .
It can't happen here
It can't happen here
I'm telling you, my dear
That it can't happen here
Because I been checkin' it out, baby
I checked it out a couple of times
But I'm telling you
It can't happen here
Oh darling, it's important that you believe me
(Bop bop bop bop)
That it can't happen here
Who could imagine that they would freak out somewhere in Kansas . . .
(Kansas . . . Kansas . . . Kansas . . . Kansas . . . )
(Kansas, Kansas, do-do-dun to-to
Kansas, Kansas, la la la)
(Kansas, Kansas, do-do-dun to-to
Kansas, Kansas)
Who could imagine that they would freak out in Minnesota . . .
(Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi
Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi . . . )
(Mama Minnesota, Mama Minnesota, Mama Minnesota,
Ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma Mama Minnesota,
Mama Minnesota, Mama Minnesota,
Ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma Mama Minnesota)
Who could imagine . . .
Who could imagine
That they would freak out in Washington, D.C.
(AC/DC bop-bop-bop)
(AC/DC do-do-do-dun, AC/DC
Ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma, AC/DC)
But it can't happen here
Oh baby, it can't happen here
(AC/DC bop-bop-bop)
Oh baby, it can't happen here
(AC/DC bop-bop-bop)
It can't happen here
Everybody's safe and it can't happen here
(AC/DC bop-bop-bop)
No freaks for us
(AC/DC bop-bop-bop)
It can't happen here
(AC/DC bop-bop-bop)
Everybody's clean and it can't happen here
No, no, it won't happen here
(No, no, it won't happen here)
(AC/DC bop-bop-bop)
I'm telling you it can't
(AC/DC bop-bop-bop)
It won't happen here
Bop-bop-ditty-bop
(I'm not worried at all, I'm not worried at all)
Ditty-bop-bop-bop
Plastic folks, you know
It won't happen here
You're safe, mama
(No no no)
You're safe, baby
(No no no)
You just cook a TV dinner
(No no no)
And you make it
Bop bop bop
(No no no)
Oh, we're gonna get a TV dinner and cook it up
(No no no no no no no!)
Oh, get a TV dinner and cook it up
Cook it up
Oh, and it won't happen here
Who could imagine
That they would freak out in the suburbs!
(No no no no no no no no no no
Man you guys are really safe
Everything's cool)
I remember (tu-tu)
I remember (tu-tu)
I remember (tu-tu)
They had a swimming pool
I remember (tu-tu)
I remember (tu-tu)
They had a swimming pool
I remember (tu-tu)
I remember (tu-tu)
They had a swimming pool
And they thought it couldn't happen here
(Duh duh duh)
They knew it couldn't happen here
They were so sure it couldn't happen here
But . . .
Suzy . . .
Yes yes, oh yes—I've always felt that
Yes, I agree man, it really makes it . . . yeah . . .
Psychedelic!
It's a real thing, man, it really makes it
FZ: Suzy, you just got to town, and we've been . . . we've been very interested in your development . . . since you first took the shots.
Suzy: Forget it!
Hmmmmmmmmm
(It can't happen here)
Well I'm about to get sick
From watchin' my TV
I been checkin' out the news
Until my eyeballs fail to see
I mean to say that every day
Is just another rotten mess
And when it's gonna change, my friend
Is anybody's guess
So I'm watchin' and I'm waitin'
And I'm hopin' for the best
Even think I'll go to prayin'
Every time I hear 'em sayin'
That there's no way to delay
That trouble comin' every day
No way to delay
That trouble comin' every day
I stayed home all afternoon, baby
(I need you, I need you)
I was polishing my car
(I need you, girl)
And there I was, I was watching television
You didn't try to call me
Momma, why don't you dig me anymore?
We were always really close together in study hall
And now it seems as though our tee-nage love is all shot to shit, baby
What is it?
Don't I use enough rose oil on my pompadour?
I don't know what the fuck's the matter, man
I've been trying so hard!
I, I tried and I tried and I tried
And then I tried over again
About, oh, fifteen or sixteen times
All I wanted to do was get in your pants, baby
What is it?
Don't you love me anymore?
Go ahead and cry
Go ahead and let the tears fall out of your eye
Let 'em fall on your crotch
You know how I love to watch
I gave you my high school ring
At the Hippo Burger, baby
We had a teen-age love
And you still got pregnant
Zilofone
Zilofone
Zilofone
Zilofone
Zilofone
Zilofone
Zilofone
Zilofone
(etc.)
(Beautiful! Beautiful!)
FZ:
Ladies & gentlemen, attention, please. I'd really like to thank you for coming up here to this, uh, musical thing and, uh, when the record comes out you can all buy it, and listen to yourselves freaking out or, you know. Maybe we'll go down to Canter's and grease a few copies, but we have to clear the room right now because, we gotta do some things here . . . yeah, oh . . . Would you please leave as swiftly as possible, although it's, you know, nice of you to come by, we gotta get you out in a hurry so we can finish recording some of these things. Thank you very much.
I would also . . . No. I would also like to request that everybody kindly leave all the instruments in the studio. They don't belong to us. Bless your hearts.
Please, I have to ask you to hurry and clear the room. The studio time is costing us a fortune every minute, and we've gotta finish it off, 'cause we're still a low budget rock & roll band. We haven't worked for six fucking weeks. Please leave the room.
Seven weeks.
We're going now.
Hurry up and get it and get back in, 'cause we're gonna lock the door.
Danny Hutton! Can I grease you for a ride somewhere?
Who's driving?
All compositions by Frank Zappa except as noted