Don't you know I'm in love with an older girl
She may be slightly wrinkled but she's the greatest in the world
Yes, I'm in love with a masked grandmathe Masked Grandma
She's always there with a [...] 'round that polka-dotted rag around her head
And she tells me, "Don't believe a single word that's been said"
I'm in love, I'm in love with a masked grandmathe Masked Grandma
(Oh, masked grandmaMasked Grandma)
She brings me jelly
She brings me jam
I just can't explain
How happy I am
I swear this is the truth
Don't think that I'm a liar
I love that wrinkled granny
She sets my soul on fire
Oh, when the evening comes and I see the setting sun
I send her off to work with a her satchel and her gun
I'm in love, I'm in love with a masked grandmathe Masked Grandma
Granny, I love you, my dearest, please say you'll never leave.
That jelly you got is too much.
I just couldn't make the grade but I'll just show yawithout you, sugar.
Please stay with me and let me whisper sweet words of pizmotology,
and discuss the pompitous pulchritudes of your jazz jams and jellies.
Please, granny, say you will be mine.
Oh, I love you so much, granny, you're so sweet.
Those wrinkles just blow my mind.
Why don'tcha do me right?
Why don'tcha do me right?
Why don'tcha do me right?
You got me pulled up tight
Why don'tcha do me right?
You got me beggin' on my knee
You got me beggin' on my knee
You got me beggin' on my knee
Say-in' baby please
Come back to me
Why don'tcha do me right?
Why don'tcha do me right?
Why don'tcha do me right?
You got me pulled up tight
Why don'tcha do me right?
What you gonna do?
Now, what you gonna do?
Now, baby, what you gonna do
Since I been true to you
What you gonna do?
I know you're tryin' to wreck my life
I know you're tryin' to wreck my life
I know you're tryin' to wreck my life
And all I wanted was a wife
Girl, you're tryin' to wreck my life
Why don'tcha do me right?
Why don'tcha do me right?
Why don'tcha do me right?
You got me pulled up tight
Why don'tcha do me right?
I'm mad with you
You know I'm mad with you
You know I'm mad with you
No tellin', no tellin'
I'm goin' to do
You know, little girl,
You know I won't always be sittin' home waiting for you in our little apartment
You know I won't always be sittin' there next to the radiator
Next to those curtains with the big roses on 'em
No, I won't be sittin' there listening to that little $45 record player you got me
No, I won't always be sittin' there in my T-shirt
No, I won't be sittin' there with my shoes and socks off
In my brown work pants waiting for you to come home
No, you're a fool if you think I would go and do that for you
'Cause you're tryin' to wreck my life and I'm mad with you for that
Mad with you
Why don'tcha do me right?
Why don'tcha do me right?
Why don'tcha do me right?
You got me pulled up tight
Why don'tcha do me right?
Girl, what you tryin' to do?
Now what you tryin' to do?
What you tryin' to do?
I'm true to you
What you tryin' to do?
I know you wanna wreck my life
I know you wanna wreck my life
I know you wanna wreck my life
And all I wanted was a wife
I know you wanna wreck my life
But I ain't goin' to be sittin' much longer
I won't be sittin' in that chair
I won't be sittin' there
Listenin'
Listenin' for your footsteps to come in up the hall
To our little apartment that we call home
With that radiator
And those big roses on the curtains
No, I won't be waitin' for you no more
Because I'm gonna leave you
I'm mad with ya and I'm gonna leave ya
Girl, I'm gonna hit the road
Girl, I'm gonna hit the road
Girl, I'm gonna hit the road
Tired of carryin' your load
Gonna hit the road
You sure have done me right
You sure have done me right
You sure have done me right
Still pull me up tight
You sure have done me right
I'm mad with you
I'm mad with you
I'm mad with you
No tellin' what I'm gonna do
Mad with you
Why didn't do me right?
Why didn't do me right?
Why didn't you do me right?
You pulled me up tight
Why didn't you do me right?
Ooh, I remember those roses on the curtains . . .
I'm losing status at the high school
I used to think that it was my school
I was the queen of every school activity
But that's no more, oh darling, what will come of me?
I'm losing status at the high school
The other night we painted posters
We played some records by The Coasters
Another pom-pom girl looked down her nose at me
She had painted tons of posters, I had painted three
I hear the secret whispers everywhere I go
My school spirit is at an all-time low
I'm losing status at the high school
I'm losing status at the high school
I'm losing status at the high school
Love of my life
I love you so
Love of my life
Don't ever go
I love you only
Love, love of my life
Stars in the sky
They never lie
Tell me you need me
Don't say goodbye
I love you only
Love, love of my life
Stars in the sky
They never lie
Don't ever leave me
Don't say goodbye
I love you darling
I love you only
Don't ever leave me
Don't make me lonely
Love of my life
I love you so
Love of my life
Don't ever go
I love you only
Love, love of my life
Love of my life
Love of my life
Love of my life
Love of my life
Miles: Can you please tell me what sort of musical activities you were involved in before you formed The Mothers?
FZ: I had a recording studio in Cucamonga, California.
Miles: Was this a sort of private thing?
FZ: No, it was supposed to be, you know, open to the public announced [?] some and I would sell studio time, but there were nobody out there who wanted to make records.
Miles: So you never made any masters out there?
FZ: Well, I made a lot of masters, but I didn't make masters of other people, you know, like people coming in off the street to use it as a commercial studio. Most of the masters that came out of it were either of overdubbed things that I made myself, or tracks involving Ray Collins who was the original lead singer for the group. Before we actually had a group, I was working with him—I produced some stuff on him.
Miles: Yeah, none that was ever issued?
FZ: Well, no. I took the masters to town, and shopped them around, and nobody picked up on them. However, before I owned the studio— The guy who had it before me was a guy named Paul Buff, and he had made masters of both Ray Collins and myself, and some of those were issued.
Miles: Yeah, I think Bob Keane put out some on Del-Fi.
FZ: Yeah, there's one called "How's Your Bird," and "The World's Greatest Sinner" was on the other side. And also I made some tracks and wrote some material for a couple of other acts at that time. One of them was released on Del-Fi with a group called The Heartbreakers. It was two fourteen year old Mexican kids who sang one side that was called "Cradle Rock," and the other side was "Everytime I See You" (sorry I can't remember what the name was). And we also leased a couple of masters to Art Laboe at Original Sound.
Miles: Who was in there?
FZ: One of them was called "Mr. Clean" by Mr. Clean, and the other one was "Grunion Run," which was released under the name of The Hollywood Persuaders. The A-side of "Grunion Run" was "Tijuana Surf" which became a number one record in Mexico for about ten months straight. It sold volumes down there.
Miles: That was yourself and Ray?
FZ: No that was, uh . . . "Grunion Run" was me and Paul Buff. And then Ray and I wrote a song called "Memories Of El Monte" which was recorded by The Penguins, and that was released on Original Sound.
Miles: There was nothing else before then?
FZ: There were a couple of releases on an extremely low-budget label.
GZ: Can I take this plate? This is cream.
FZ: Thanks, yeah, ok.. The label was called Vigah!, V-I-G-A-H, and there is several things out on that. One of them, the first record I ever made, was called "Breaktime," by a group called The Masters, which was me and Paul Buff and Ronnie Williams, who was playing drums and bass on the thing. It was an overdub deal. And then the next . . .
Miles: What date was it, about?
FZ: Ah, that was '62 or '63. See what else we have . . . We made a record with a local disc jockey from San Bernardino, named Brian Lord, who could do a Kennedy imitation. And we recorded a record called "The Big Surfer," which had a very strange punch line to it. And we took it in— we released it on Vigah!, and it was getting a lot of play in San Bernardino because the guy was a disc jockey. So we took it in to Capitol, and offered it to them. And they bought the master right away. They gave us 800 dollars up front for it.
Miles: Who was that who bought it?
FZ: Jim Economides. And they never released it, because one of the lines in there had something about— for winning our dance contest you get to be the first members of the peace corps to be sent to Alabama. About a week after they bought the master, Medgar Evers got shot. So, it was just too hot to release, you know.
Miles: Where was this Vigah! label based? In San Bernardino?
FZ: No, Vigah! was just a name that we cooked up for the stuff that was made there, in Cucamonga.
Miles: And as it was your label, you . . .
FZ: No, it was Paul Buff's label, you know, because he owned the studio at that time. I was just a creep that used to hang around there. And we also recorded a parody of Paul & Paula, called Ned & Nelda, which was— One side was "Ned & Nelda," and the other side was "Surf Along With Ned & Nelda."
Miles: So you made mostly comedy and satiricals?
FZ: Yeah.
Miles: [...]
FZ: Yeah, well even before that, because prior to the time I had access to a recording studio, I would rent tape recorders from a local hi-fi shop on the weekends. And, for about five bucks for a weekend, I'd have all my friends over to the house, and we improvised plays and stuff. I still have a lot of those tapes.
Miles: You should put them out, yes . . .
FZ: I wish I could. I don't know whether there's really a market for some of that kind of humor. I also did research, where I would interview people. Get their life stories. Some of the most grotesque events of the century.
Miles: Right, what sort of . . .
FZ: Well, the story of Ronnie and Kenny . . . Like Kenny saved his piss in these mason jars out at the back of his house until black things started growing in it and increased in size and swam around in the jars, and [...] knew what it was. And his brother Ronnie who saved his snot on the window of his room. I have them telling about these things. And . . .
Miles: What, were these locals . . .
FZ: They were kids who lived in Ontario. Ronnie was the guitar player on the first record. You know, they're just— If I met somebody and they looked like they had a story to tell, I would just say, hear it!
Miles: And this guy had these black things?
FZ: Yeah, you want to hear him tell about it?
Miles: Yeah, that's pretty weird . . .
FZ: Hold on.
Miles: [...]
FZ: I don't know, but at one time we delivered to Bob Keane masters for— You know the album Lumpy Gravy? You know the last tune on Lumpy Gravy goes da-ta-daa, da-ta-ta da-ta-taa, and a little bongo fill, da-da-dada-dada-dada-diddy-diddy . . . it's called "Take Your Clothes Off When You Dance," and it's in the We're Only In It For The Money album . . . We took that very same master that's on Lumpy Gravy, because it was recorded in '62 or '63, and took it to him. And he sat on it and never released it. And we got it back.
All compositions by Frank Zappa except as noted