Sleep Dirt

He used to be very kind
(In his own crude way)
And He wasn't always like I wanted him to be

He wasn't smart
He wasn't handsome either
But he thrilled me
When he drilled me
And I have I've never loved a monster quite like he

Because his
Love
Was so
Flam-bay

His kisses burned me so
His kisses turned me
From a Queen
On a throne
To a shrivelling stool

Here I stand
All alone
A spider's fool
(When it's me he needs
To fondle his tool)

I guess some
Bugs
Are just
That way

He don't really need your love
He don't really need you

To be there
When his hair
Gets matted and gray
With a broom
Cleaning his room
From the mess he made that day
Out of Earthling arms
He nibbled away

Oh Hunchentoot, my love
How could you desert me now?
Oh, Hunchentoot you brute!
Can't you see I want you

Stay with me!
Flagrantly!
And we'll have ecstasy
For all eternity!

Because your
Love
Is so
Flam-bay

You kisses burn me so
Your kisses turn me
From a Queen
On a throne
To a shrivelling stool

I don't mind
If you're unkind, 'cause
Spiders rule!

Yes, you're all real cool
With those little webs you spool
And all your Spider Drool . . . Oh!
Let me float in your pool!

Listen carefully
Spider of Destiny
You must heed the call
Of Cosmo-Biology
Listen to me!

If you eat the Earthlings now
Things will all be fine, and then
We'll repair our love somehow
And resume the busy schedule
Of our ruthless conquest once again!

Listen carefully
Spider of Destiny
I will not allow
This marvellous
Opportunity
To be taken from me
Taken from me
So . . .

Eat the Earth people
Eat them, and chew them, and brutally
Stomp on the rest of what's left
And then report to me
For the conquest of the Earth
(And the Moon and the stars)
And the space in between
All the comets and stuff
Will be ours!

Eat the Earth people
Eat them, and chew them, and brutally
Stomp on the rest of what's left
Stomp on the rest of what's left
Stomp on the rest of what's left

Time is money
But Space is a long, long time

Perhaps you are surprised
To see I speak your language

But I have been monitoring
Your Earthly broadcasts for
Many years
For many years
And the reception on my little planet
Is extremely fine

Time is money
But Space is a long, long time
On my lonely throne
In the cosmic night I ponder the vast expanses
Between your puny world and mine

From my Couch-In-The-Sky
As my planet goes by
I behold all your misery below there
I have seen all your lying
And crying, and dying
And, believe me
Your planet is nowhere!

Space is a very long time!

And if the equation
As set forth above
Is proved when we get to
The bottom line
The Powers Financial
I'll hold o'er your world
Will complete my fantastic design

And the whole Equivalent Earth shall be mine!

And the whole Equivalent Earth shall be mine!

And the whole Equivalent Earth shall be mine!

Mine!
Mine!
Mine!
Mine!
Mine!
Mine!
Mine!
Mine!
Mine!